Final April, I made a decision to take a 30-day break from ingesting. What I didn’t count on was how that one small choice would quietly reshape the best way I transfer by means of my days, join with folks, and present up for myself. At first, it was simply an experiment. It was a approach to reset after a season that felt a bit of too full, a bit of too quick. My pores and skin was infected, my vitality was shot, and I used to be caught in a loop of late-night snacking and stressed mornings. I needed to really feel higher in my physique and clearer in my thoughts—particularly as I navigated a breakup that I knew I didn’t need to blur with a buzz.
However letting go of alcohol wasn’t so simple as saying no to a drink. My default was at all times a glass in hand—at dinner, at live shows, after a protracted day. It was baked into my routines and tied carefully to how I noticed myself. I’d taken sommelier programs. I knew tips on how to pair wine with meals, tips on how to discuss it, tips on how to make it a part of a second, and integral to every journey I booked. So, sitting down at a restaurant and skipping the wine checklist? It felt off—like I used to be lacking part of the expertise or part of myself.
Characteristic picture by Michelle Nash.
However over time, the discomfort gave approach to one thing else: area. With out the predictable rhythm of a drink to lean on, I began to note what I really wanted on the finish of a tough day—perhaps it was relaxation, or connection, or just quiet. I acquired inquisitive about how I felt after I wasn’t always recovering from the evening earlier than. The fog lifted. My pores and skin began to clear. I wasn’t dragging myself by means of mornings anymore. I used to be really rested.
That quiet readability—together with the stunning delight I felt—was sufficient to maintain me going. I wasn’t chasing some good model of myself. I simply felt higher. And for the primary time in a very long time, that was sufficient. Because the months handed, I stored ready for a second to reach the place a drink would’ve made the expertise higher, both extra enjoyable, extra particular, or extra value it. However it by no means got here. And after I imagined buying and selling my peace for a hangover, or my presence for a blur, the reply grew to become easy: I didn’t want it anymore.
Greatest Learnings and Surprises
Once I first determined to stop ingesting, I assumed the modifications could be easy. I anticipated to really feel more healthy, sleep higher, and expertise some readability. However what actually shocked me have been the deeper, sudden shifts that got here alongside the best way.
1. I grew to become extra in-tune with myself.
The primary massive realization was that alcohol wasn’t simply affecting my bodily well being—it was influencing how I confirmed up on the earth. I assumed I wanted it to unwind after a protracted day or to be social. However with out it, I discovered myself tuning in to what I really wanted: relaxation, area, and connection, with out the haze of a hangover or the social stress of becoming in.
2. Alcohol isn’t my id.
I additionally realized how a lot I’d tied alcohol to my id. For years, I assumed having a drink in my hand was what made me enjoyable, partaking, and “cool” in sure settings. I now know that I can have simply as a lot enjoyable—in all probability extra—after I’m totally current, with out the crutch of a drink. The liberty of figuring out I will be me with out counting on alcohol is empowering.
3. My physique beloved the change.
One of many largest surprises, although, was how a lot my physique beloved the change. I by no means anticipated my pores and skin to clear up or my vitality ranges to skyrocket. I didn’t notice how a lot psychological readability I used to be lacking, or how refreshing it might be to get up feeling restored as a substitute of dreading the day after an evening out.
4. It wasn’t as onerous as I assumed.
One other sudden realization? I had made every little thing really feel tougher than it really was. I spent a lot time worrying about how it could really feel, how I’d navigate social conditions, or what I’d be lacking out on. However in actuality, the method wasn’t almost as troublesome as I’d imagined. It’s been a lot simpler to point out up as myself with out alcohol, and the moments I as soon as feared have turned out to be simpler—and extra pleasant—than I assumed.
I wasn’t chasing some good model of myself. I simply felt higher. And for the primary time in a very long time, that was sufficient.
5. I saved cash—and time.
However there’s extra: I by no means anticipated how a lot time and cash I’d save. I hadn’t realized how a lot my routine—eating out, grabbing drinks, or attending occasions—was draining each my checking account and my schedule. With out the impulse to exit for drinks or make last-minute plans, I’ve discovered extra time for actions that truly nourish me, and my pockets is definitely happier too.
6. No one actually cares (in a great way).
After which there’s the shock that’s in all probability essentially the most liberating of all: Nobody cares as a lot as I assumed they might. I used to be satisfied that not ingesting would make me stand out in a room, make me appear completely different, and even awkward. However the reality? Persons are extra targeted on themselves than I ever gave them credit score for.
As soon as I began quietly sharing bits of my journey on social media, one thing sudden occurred—I noticed I wasn’t alone. Folks I had at all times seen because the lifetime of the occasion, the cool, effortlessly social ones, reached out to say they weren’t ingesting both. Some had walked away from alcohol after combating it, whereas others, like me, merely needed a distinct sort of life. Both approach, it jogged my memory that we’re all simply figuring it out. And it felt actually, actually good to know I wasn’t doing it alone.
A Few Questions I Get About Not Ingesting
Many individuals are inquisitive about my choice. Lots of people surprise if I’m nonetheless social, or if I miss having a drink in hand, and right here’s the factor: I completely thought I wouldn’t be as enjoyable, or as outgoing, or as social with out alcohol. Would I really get out on the dance ground? Would I be as humorous?
I’ve discovered is that it’s not the drink that makes the night—it’s the connection. Seems, I’m much more enjoyable after I really keep in mind my evenings, and I’m way more partaking after I’m totally current. The conversations I’ve had since I’ve stopped ingesting have felt even deeper, extra significant, and extra genuine. And waking up refreshed, figuring out I’m able to tackle a exercise or a productive day? It’s a much better excessive than something I may’ve gotten from a drink.
I’m typically requested if I’ll ever drink once more. The brief reply is: I haven’t but encountered a second that feels definitely worth the danger of not feeling my greatest. So, for now, I’m not . That doesn’t imply I gained’t change my thoughts down the street—it simply means, at this level, I’m not prepared to commerce a brief buzz for the knowledge of feeling lower than nice the subsequent day.
The place to Begin if You’re Sober Curious
There’s no single blueprint for altering your relationship with alcohol—what labored for me might not be just right for you. This journey is deeply private, and that’s what makes it so highly effective. For some, it would begin with curiosity. For others, a second of discomfort, a life shift, or just a need to really feel higher.
I started with a 30-day break. That was the one aim. No long-term commitments, no massive declarations—only a window of time to see how I felt. That gave me the area to note what alcohol had been protecting up, and what life regarded like with out it.
In the event you’re questioning the place to begin, perhaps it’s simply that: a pause. A second to examine in with your self. You don’t must have all of the solutions or map out a 12 months. You simply want a bit of willingness to see what may be attainable on the opposite aspect of 1 completely different selection.
A New, Alcohol-Free Starting
This has been a journey of studying to take heed to myself, to honor my wants, and to embrace a life I by no means thought was attainable with out alcohol. Every selection, each “first,” has jogged my memory of the power I didn’t know I had—and that’s guiding me now in methods I hadn’t anticipated.
The query I proceed to ask myself is, “What else in my life have I been holding onto, convinced that it’s necessary but may not actually be?”
Deciding to not drink has been a every day selection, a gradual overhaul. Socializing with out one thing in hand wasn’t at all times simple, particularly after I not often went out with out it earlier than. However with every new alternative, I’ve seen that I don’t want alcohol to navigate the world, and I’m nonetheless in a position to get pleasure from life totally. It’s about embracing the current, with out ready for that momentary buzz, and discovering pleasure within the readability that’s left behind.